Welcome to Live!Sex!Girls! and my blog that has absolutley nothing to do with porn. They say that if you namecheck a bunch of wildly well known people then the Big Brother-ish searchy-touchy- feely-engine-thingies that crawl the interweb - and frankly scare the shit out of me- will 'lock on' and 'tune in' and generally make you instantly famous and sensationally successful and stuff. Hang on a sec. Hello Comedy Gods and Goddesses -
Hello Supreme Being - Lorne Michaels. Hello brilliantly bonkers Brits Craig Ferguson, Sacha Baron Cohen, Ricky Gervais and Eddie Izzard - who should be named Emperor .Hello hilarious high-end entertainment ho's - Kathy Griffin, Chelsea Handler, Sarah Silverman and that sweet wallflower Lisa Lampanelli.... And a massive hello (and a free shag voucher) to anyone else out there with their own show (Kimmel, Conan, Leno, Letterman, Lopez, Colbert, Jon Stewart, Oprah?- c'mon you know who you are) and enough sway to have a Live!Sex!Girl! or two on their 'chat couch', should they choose. When I say 'have'.... K. Bored with that now. Did it work? Is anyone reading yet? Blimey! I'm bloody blogging! This is my first attempt at 'Blogging', mostly because it's such a thoroughly disgusting word - far to close to 'bog' (bog being the British for kazi, crapper, shithouse ... in case you are of non-European persuasion) and 'log', which, of course, is what goes in a 'bog'.
Sounds so incredibly yuk...'Hello, I'm Pippa Hinchley and this is my blog!' ... eugh! Like I'm possibly inviting you to look at my stools...
Anyway, I'm doing this having been on a crashingly boring yet frighteningly informative 'web and social media' course - in order to help my incredibly low rent web series. They advise blogging in order to 'grow your audience' and really 'connect' with them (whilst not quite explaining how you get that audience in the first place). Soooo...
Hi. I'm Pippa Hinchley and Live!Sex!Girls! is my gang, innit? (good? more street?) Live!Sex!Girls! is a gang of @funnybritchix (twitter name, right?) And I'm writing about us here, on my 'puter. Gottit? Though I admit I look really butch in the biker outfit, we are not lesbians. Not that we have anything against them. In fact, we are perfectly prepared to go for a little girl-on-girl action complete with extra virgin olive oil if it'll get us the gay vote and a gig. So, um, all you - er, women - feel free to... letch. Whatever.
Being a Brit and newly in LA I soon had to find a few @funnybritchix (twitter name)(repetition is also good apparently) to have a pint and a good old swear with (they're so fucking conservative here). At the end of 2009 Live!Sex!Girls! (LSG, for the 'initially' obsessed) performed its 1st live show at the gorgeous and sexy Acme Theatre in Los Angeles, as part of the LA Comedy Festival. The show went down like a whore on Hugh Grant and, so as not to disappoint our 7 fans, and although we lost some girls to the pole dancing industry, we added some new ones and did a second LA Comedy Festival show in May 2010 . We now have fans in double figures. Allegedly. Between the two shows we began filming horribly lo-budget sketches and have now completed 'series 1' of the web series. Despite spending no more than $1-50 on each sketch, and using small children from The People's Republic of China to edit them, we have been 'picked up' (ooh, er) and are shortly to be aired in all our low-rentedness on StayTuned TV and Bablegum. Who knows, you might even be able to buy LSG underwear soon. All 13 of you.
The current Live!Sex!Girls! lineup is: Pippa Hinchley, Tamsin Hollo, Ceri Bethan and Michelle Cardno. Occasionally we let a boy come and play. Usually we ask him to appear semi-naked for no obvious reason.
It's been an interesting week... Like I said LSG has been 'picked up' (ooh, er missus)* by StayTunedTV and Babelgum...which is nice - but has meant I have had to struggle with my inner geek in order to do some serious 'firsts'. First solo web site build, first tweets, first blog (yuk) )I'm gonna call it an 'online diary' from now on, ok?), first seriously complicated edit (sound AND vision AND graphics) on i-movie, sitting with a bunch of other special needs techno dunces in the utter hell that is the Santa Monica Apple Store..... I don't know how to add the twitter link thing yet or the facebook link thing or the youtube link thing, so I'll just tell you now we are @funnybritchix if you wanna tweet us and www.facebook.com/livesexgirls and www.youtbe.com/thelivesexgirls and ....god this is exhausting....www.livesexgirlscomedy.com Here you can see Gale Force - all action weather woman/nymphomaniac; the Killing Boyfriends Trilogy (never let a little murder put you off having a good laugh, I say) and Simon Cowell being interviewed by Nancy Grace about his brand new TV show: President Idol - amongst other titbits (ooh, er).
We will be appearing live again in the next few months either in LA OR the Big Apple. Watch this space. More tales from the whore that is Hollywood to follow.
May the Joke Be On You.
Pipx * for those bewildered by the addition of (ooh, er) or (ooh, er missus) after an apparently random phrase, you can be sure of two things. 1. you are not, nor ever have been, British.
2. all will be stripped bare (ooh, er) and openly revealed (ooh, er missus), in time. Yours sincerely, I. Nnuendo.