Sunday, March 27, 2011

The first blog is the hardest......

Hello comedy lovers. 
Welcome to Live!Sex!Girls! and my blog that has absolutley nothing to do with porn.
They say that if you namecheck a bunch of wildly well known people then the Big Brother-ish searchy-touchy- feely-engine-thingies that crawl the interweb - and frankly scare the shit out of me- will 'lock on' and 'tune in' and generally make you instantly famous and sensationally successful and stuff.  Hang on a sec.

Hello Comedy Gods and Goddesses - 
Hello Supreme Being - Lorne Michaels
Hello brilliantly bonkers Brits Craig FergusonSacha Baron Cohen, Ricky Gervais and Eddie Izzard - who should be named Emperor . Hello hilarious high-end entertainment ho's - Kathy GriffinChelsea Handler, Sarah Silverman and  that  sweet wallflower Lisa Lampanelli.... 
And  a massive hello (and a free shag voucher) to anyone else out there with their own show - Kimmel, Conan, Leno, Letterman, Colbert, Jon Stewart, Oprah - and enough sway to have a Live!Sex!Girl! or two on their 'chat couch', should they choose.  When I say 'have'....
Bored with that now.
Did it work? Is anyone reading yet?

Blimey! I'm bloody blogging!
This is my first attempt at 'Blogging', mostly because it's such a thoroughly disgusting word - far too close to 'bog' (bog being the British for kazi, crapper, shithouse ... in case you are of non-European persuasion) and 'log', which, of course, is what goes in a 'bog'.
Sounds so incredibly yuk...'Hello, I'm Pippa Hinchley and this is my blog!' ... eugh! Like I'm possibly inviting you to look at my stools...

Anyway, I'm doing this having been on a crashingly boring yet frighteningly informative 'web and social media' course - in order to help my incredibly low rent web series. They advise blogging in order to 'grow your audience' and really 'connect' with them (whilst not quite explaining how you get that audience in the first place). Soooo...

Hi. I'm Pippa Hinchley and Live!Sex!Girls! is my gang, innit? (better? more street?)
Live!Sex!Girls! is a gang of @funnybritchix (twitter name, right?) and I'm writing about us here, on my 'puter. iInnit. Gottit?
Though I admit I do look really butch in the biker outfit, we are not lesbians. Not that we have anything against them. 

In fact, we are perfectly prepared to go for a little girl-on-girl action complete with extra virgin olive oil if it'll get us the gay vote and a decent gig. 
So, um, all you - women so inclined - feel free to... letch. Whatever.

Being a Brit and newly in LA,  I soon had to find a few @funnybritchix  (twitter name), repetition is also good apparently, to have a pint  and a good old swear with.  They're so fucking conservative here!!!

At the end of 2009 Live!Sex!Girls!  (LSG, for the 'initially' obsessed) performed its 1st live show at the gorgeous and sexy Acme Theatre in Los Angeles, as part of the LA Comedy Festival

The show went down like a whore on Hugh Grant and, so as not to disappoint our 7 fans, and although we lost some girls to the pole dancing industry, we added some new ones and did a second LA Comedy Festival in May 2010 .
We now have fans in double figures. Allegedly.

Between the two shows we began filming horribly lo-budget sketches and  have now completed 'series 1' of the web show.
Despite spending no more than $1-50 on each sketch and using small children from The People's Republic of China to edit them, we have been 'picked up' by (ooh, er) and will shortly be aired in all our low-rent glory on StayTuned TV and Europe's Bablegum.
Who knows, you might even be able to buy LSG underwear soon.
All 13 of you.

The current Live!Sex!Girls! lineup is: Pippa Hinchley,  Tamsin Hollo,  Ceri Bethan and Michelle Cardno.
Occasionally, we let a boy come and play but only give him a very small 'boyfriend' part.  And usually we ask him to appear semi-naked for absolutely 
no obvious reason.

It's been an interesting week...

LSG has been 'picked up' (ooh, er missus)* by StayTunedTV and Babelgum (repetition) - which is great but it has meant I have had to meet and endure a huge struggle with my inner geek in order to do some serious 'firsts': 
First solo web site build, 

first tweets, 
first blog (yuk) )I'm gonna call it an 'online diary' from now on, ok?, first seriously complicated edit  (sound AND vision AND graphics) on i-movie, sitting with a bunch of other special needs techno dunces in the utter hell that is the Santa Monica Apple Store.....

I don't know how to add the TWITTER link thing yet or the FACEBOOK link thing or the YOUTUBE link thing, so I'll just tell you right now that we can be found at:
@funnybritchix  on Twitter.  So go on, tweet us and see if we can even do it back right. 

Our youtube channel is  where you can see all the sketches we have on our website plus other comedy bits too, like one of the live shows from the LA Comedy Fest;  just don't moan at us about the awful static cameras.
Clearly we didin't seem responsible enough to have our own crew in to shoot our show, you know, the sort that might have moved around a few times and maybe done a close-up? AND we had to buy the crappy footage off them or have no record of all that gorgeous applause.

Lastly we are here, Jesus this is exhausting, where my blog lives too at:

Here you will meet hot, all action weather woman, Gale Force , giving it to you at 6 and 10; the Killing Boyfriends Classic Trilogy (never let a little murder stop you enjoying yourselves we always say); and a fellow bolshy Brit - Simon Cowell, being interviewed by Nancy Grace about  making American history with his HUGE new Reality TV series: President Idol.

We will be appearing live again in the next few months either in LA or the Big Apple, so watch this space, people. More tales to follow from the whore that is Hollywood. 
Til then, do please keep twatting and sharing us and may the Joke Be On You. 
Best Wishes,
Pip and the LSGs!

* for those bewildered by the addition of (ooh, er) or (ooh, er missus) after an apparently random phrase, you can be sure of two things. 1. you are not, nor ever have been, British. 
2. all will be stripped bare (ooh, er) and openly revealed (ooh, er missus), in time.  Yours sincerely,  I. Nnuendo.